Patients/Patience

Phew. *Wiping sweat off forehead.* It’s been quite a week month year in the health arena for the Karlek kids. Chandler totally gets what I mean:

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Kristofer was in an accident last year that left his motorcycle* (and knees) totaled. He’s recovered after a long healing process, but will probably struggle with achy knees indefinitely.

*Previously, I may have specified that the motorcycle was a Ducati. However, after a recent attempt to impress a cute guy by showing I was familiar with Ducati and mentioned my brother’s, when asked what kind Kristofer had, I had no answer to give. Just a blank stare. And I was called out by previously mentioned guy on not knowing. Lesson learned: don’t try to be cool. PS, I did ask my brother after the fact: Ducati Hypermotard SP.

Then there’s me. I began having severe back pain last year, was diagnosed with degenerative disc disease, was told I don’t have degenerative disc disease and that the pain was caused by something else entirely (issues with psoas muscles), and began a new healing process. But in that healing process, I’ve done something to cause crazy pain/inflammation to my sternum area, and solution for that is still TBD.

And Bethany. Well, my sister’s health issues are still a bit too fresh for me to be okay writing about in great detail. Suffice it to say it’s of greater concern than achy knees, lower back, or sternum pain. But very soon we will have results and we will know that everything has been taken care of and she’ll be absolutely fine. Then it’ll just be a matter of frequent follow-up visits for the next year or so.

Having it all written out like that…yikes. Sorry, mom. Oh, and mom’s also dealt with a ton of back pain and is still working through that. So really, sorry dad. What a trooper.

It’s a lot. A lot of opportunity for pain, frustration, confusion. But through all the curveballs life throws our way, health-related or otherwise, we don’t have to focus on the ‘a lot.’ With grace, we’re given the opportunity to change our perspective, and focus on the lessons we need to learn.

Do you notice recurring themes in your life? Lessons that, with each curveball life throws at you, it seems God/the universe/the writers of the weekly horoscope column are trying to teach you? For me, that lesson is patience.

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Those close to me know that I’m about as impatient as they come. And if there’s one realm that requires patience, it’s being a patient. (Or being close to someone who is.)

For 6 months I couldn’t get to the bottom of my back pain, and it drove me crazy. And once I finally uncovered the cause and how to heal, the process was not short enough to satisfy me. I’m also going on 5 months of severe sternum pain, and two methods of treatment in I’m none the wiser of how to heal, and it’s more frustrating than I can say. Patience, you tease.

This week was particularly trying. As I drove to a doctor’s appointment on Thursday, a follow-up visit for my sternum pain, my head was filled with thoughts. Thoughts of not only the ongoing sternum issue and when I’d get to the bottom of it, but thoughts also of my sister’s surgery taking place the following day. To say I was pre-occupied is a grand understatement. So it shouldn’t have come as too big of a surprise when, driving to aforementioned doctor’s visit, I felt myself rear-end the car in front of me. Everyone is fine, neither car really suffered much, and even the officer said it was “just a little bump.” But that didn’t stop the gentleman I hit from acting as though I’d just ran over his child, intentionally at that.

On my way to the doctor, the day before my sister’s surgery, I get into a car accident with Rude-y McJudgey. It was one of those moments where you just look upwards and say, “Really?” But after the shock wore off and emotions settled, I had to just sit back and say, “okay, universe. I get it. Time for an attitude adjustment. And maybe a change in perspective.”

Because you know what? Everything is okay. And you know what else? It always is. It always is okay. Curveballs are continuously going to be thrown at us. But it’s not the curveballs that affect us; it’s how we handle them. I’m sure no one reading this is a stranger to adages about your attitude and perspective making all the difference in any situation, no matter how seemingly awful. And friends, those adages couldn’t be more true. My personal favorite will always be: “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

Your perspective makes all the difference. Sure, things might seem pretty crappy and scary. And not having the answers might drive you absolutely insane. (Looking at you, Tori.) But just take a deep breath, sit back and think about all of the wonderful things you have to be grateful for. Know that you’ll have the answers when it’s time, and know that it will all be okay. Be patient. Even if you are a patient. Maybe especially then.

Yesterday my parents, my sister’s fiancé, and I spent almost 8 hours in a hospital waiting room. And now we wait 5-6 days before we know what’s next. And in the meantime, my sister is sore and bruised and bandaged. And stuck in bed/on-couch indefinitely. And waiting. We’re all waiting. But instead of waiting with worry and getting frustrated that we don’t know yet, I hope we all keep the ‘right’ attitude and know that no matter what, it’s going to be okay.

I hope we can all have a little patience. Because you know what? It is going to be okay.

Curiously,
Tori